


turn my living soul to ice

by Thorinsmut



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Complete, Cute lesbians, F/F, Get Together, One-Shot, Smut, Talking, and I firmly believe in writing the smuts I want to see in the world, look someone had to smush the soft lesbian and the hard lesbian together, no longer canon compliant, tol and smol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-20
Updated: 2016-11-20
Packaged: 2018-09-01 05:09:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8610064
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thorinsmut/pseuds/Thorinsmut
Summary: Mei knows better than to get attached. Enough people have died and left her behind already. She is determined not to let the same thing happen with Overwatch.Unfortunately for her plans for a lifetime of loneliness, she’s got a weak spot. A giant pink-haired weak spot with a big heart and great guns.





	

**Author's Note:**

> There should be mouseover translations for your reading pleasure.

The first time Mei ended up in bed with Zarya it could be blamed on the adrenaline of the moment. Overwatch was re-forming, pulling together to oppose Talon, and Mei was willing to join up. If nothing else, it helped her travel the world to discover the cause of the climate anomalies.

It gave her _one_ touchstone in a world that had moved on without her.

They'd fought a successful mission together—Mei and Zarya, along with a few others too, of course, but it was Zarya who fought closest to Mei. Zarya threw her shield around Mei when the enemy was targeting her, using it to charge her particle canon and unleash fury on the Talon goons. Mei threw up ice walls to block the enemy and give them time to get in position to take them out. Mei slowed and froze the goons, and Zarya took them down with her particle blasts. They fought side by side, shooting past each other to watch each other's backs, and never getting in each other's way. Best of all was the time Zarya threw her graviton surge to pull the goons into a pile, and Mei added her blizzard to the chaos.

"Together, we are strong!" Zarya bellowed, laughing big and loud. After that it was just mopping up, and they got the payload to the carrier and all collapsed in it to be carried back to base.

"Well done!" Tracer praised, bouncing off the walls herself. "You lovelies were unstoppable!"

"It could not have gone better," Winston praised. "These supplies will get our base working at at least 70%."

Morrison—or Soldier76, as he went by now—was more quiet. He just nodded to them all and went to rest in a corner of the carrier. Everyone was splitting up, finding privacy. Mei tried to rest too, but her entire body was buzzing with the adrenaline, and Zarya was sprawled out in the seat beside her—big muscles lightly sheened with sweat. She turned a smile on Mei, slinging her arm around the back of Mei's chair, and really it was not Mei's fault if she straddled Zarya and kissed her right there.

Thankfully, the impulsive action was not unwelcome. Zarya made a pleased little moaning sound against Mei's lips, big warm hands coming to rest on Mei's hips to hold her close. Her mouth opened easily under Mei's, kissing back every bit as hungrily as Mei kissed her—without taking over. She remained gentle. Mei's hands had a mind of their own, cupping Zarya's strong jaw, stroking down her neck, across her broad shoulders and then down those magnificent arms. Zarya flexed her biceps, and laughed when Mei dug her nails in with a gasp. When they landed at the base Zarya lifted Mei down from her lap like she weighed nothing, casual strength sending butterflies fluttering through Mei's belly.

"My room?" Zarya offered, her hand engulfing Mei's and her deep green eyes sparkling.

"Yes please!" Mei nodded, bouncing on her toes in excitement. They fell into each other as soon as they were alone, clothes discarded and their hands and mouths exploring everywhere.

Zarya was hard everywhere, all muscles. Mei had always been soft and plump. She might have gotten self-conscious of their difference, if Zarya had not been so obviously pleased by what she found when she got Mei out of her heavy coat.

"Perfect," Zarya murmured, cupping Mei's breasts in her hands. "So beautiful," she praised, running her hands down Mei's back and sides. Meanwhile Mei was busy with her own exploration. There were scars in lumps here and there on Zarya's body, and she moaned beautifully when Mei sucked on her nipples or bit her neck. Mei laughed when she caught sight of Zarya's pubes. Zarya's lower lips were shaved, but the tuft of curls on her mound was dyed bubblegum pink just like her hair.

"Carpet should be matching drapes, _da_?" Zarya said, laughing with Mei—but then Mei pushed her face between her thighs and Zarya said no more in words. She was tangy and musky, her clit big and firm under Mei's lips. She moaned, powerful thighs quaking around Mei's head and her fingers utterly mussing Mei's hair. She orgasmed quickly, and then had a second right on the heels of the first, entire body tensing and her mouth wide open on a silent gasp. The third took a little longer, with Mei moaning into her sex, tongue circling quick and light on her clit. Then Zarya gently pushed Mei's face away. She pulled Mei up, kissing her own flavor from her mouth and moaning in approval.

Zarya's strong fingers were gentle when they explored Mei's sex, stroking smooth and light with the ample wetness she was producing. Mei shuddered her climax in Zarya's arms, held close. Zarya was so careful with her strength, and it made Mei's heart feel all warm and melty.

Too much. Too close. Mei pushed out of Zarya's arms and got dressed to go. Zarya remained sprawled out on the bed, powerful body gone soft in repose. She didn't try to stop Mei, just caught her hand and brought it to her mouth to kiss the back. It would be far too easy to kiss her again, let herself soften and lie with Zarya instead of leaving. Mei could imagine spending _hours_ cuddling and kissing and having sex with her, forgetting dinner and raiding the kitchen late at night, like with her college girlfriends.

_Gone. All of them long gone._

"Sorry. I should go. Sorry," Mei said, feeling her face heat as she tugged her hand away.

"No apologies," Zarya let her hand go, though she could have kept it. "We had good times."

"Um. Yes. We did. Thank you," Mei agreed, and only stumbled over her own boots a _little_ bit when she went out the door. There wasn't anyone directly outside Zarya's door, thankfully, but McCree was lounging against the wall at the end of the corridor. Mei braced herself, but he just touched the brim of his hat and nodded to her on her way past and she could ignore the slight smirk on his lips.

Falling into bed with Zarya was easy. What came after wasn't.

Mei wasn't ashamed. No. Not even a little bit. It didn't even seem she like she was the topic of rumor and speculation. What was hard was Zarya—the softening of her expression when she looked at Mei, the casual touch of her hand bracing Mei's back when she reached past her for something in the equipment room or the dining room.

Mei wanted to melt into it, every time.

It wasn't as though she could be angry at Zarya for presuming anything, because she didn't. She was just _friendly_. It wasn't Zarya's fault that Mei's belly got all squirmy when she caught sight of her armwrestling Winston, both of them straining with all their might, and Zarya jumping up on the table to flex and declare herself the strongest woman in the world when she won. Or the time Zarya was benchpressing Tracer in the common room, with Tracer of course making a show of reading her book while she was being used as a weight.

"Too light. I feel nothing!" Zarya complained, while the rest of the gathering Overwatch crew teased and laughed, friendly and comfortable.

Of course an entire _person_ would weigh nothing to her. Zarya was, after all, the kind of woman who carried around a gun most commonly mounted on a tank. She was strong enough for it.

"Skinny girl, you will not survive the winter," Zarya teased, setting Tracer down safe and sound, and she winked at Mei.

Mei's face heated, probably going bright red, but thankfully it didn't seem anyone else had noticed.

"Can't feel the cold if you're moving fast enough!" Tracer joked back.

"Mmm, I do like fast women," McCree commented with a smirk, which meant that everyone piled on to heckle him. It was just like a family, everyone teasing and having a good time. Nobody noticed Mei flee back to the lab. She only realized when she was back that she hadn't remembered to fill her kettle to make tea, but she wasn't going to be heading back out into the common areas again! Not until she was sure they would be empty. Mei had fresh data from the weather beacons she'd set out around the world, not to mention what data she'd been able to salvage from the eco-Watchpoints she'd visited so far, and years' worth of weather science to catch up on. Lots of work to do.

Winston showed up eventually, and brightened as he always did when he saw her. He'd been alone for a very long time and _wanted_ to be around people. "Dr. Zhou! Any breakthroughs?"

"More data means more anomalies," Mei said, showing him her preliminary graphs. There were still huge gaps in it. "There's nothing solid yet, but I'm sure I'll figure it out eventually."

"I am certain you will. I have every trust in your abilities," Winston praised, nodding to himself. "I was wondering, when you have a moment, if you could look over a few of my equations? I've been looking at them so long I can't see my mistakes anymore."

"I'm happy to help!" Mei promised. "Just let me get this dataset logged?"

"Of course," Winston granted, smiling, and let her be.

It was easiest working in the labs. Mei could maintain some professional distance from Winston, and Dr. Zeigler too, when she was in the lab. It was much harder living in proximity to the rest of the Overwatch crew. There were inside jokes, complaints about the food. Game nights. Commiseration about the state of the world and encouragement of everyone's personal projects.

Just like any group of people pulling together.

Just like a group of scientists gathered together in an eco-Watchpoint far away from anyone else in the world, full of energy and life and hope for the future. A found family, loving each other all in their own ways.

_Dead. All dead._

Mei tried to keep her distance, she really did, but it was impossible. She occasionally shared a cup of green tea with Dr. Ziegler—with _Angela—_ when they were both staying up late in the lab, and Angela smiled at her over the rim of it. One morning Angela made a face at the teas in the group kitchen cabinet and asked Mei if she might spare a little of her stash, and somehow Mei ended up making a big pot of her favorite jade snail tea for everyone in the base. Everyone was gathered in the living room, while Mei described the tea and the proper way to prepare it and poured it into the pretty little cups of her tea set to pass around.

"You have got the touch, Mei. Nobody else brews tea as well," Angela praised.

Hanzo breathed the steam of his deeply, sipping slowly. "Perfect. Your taste is impeccable Ms Zhou."

"It's no cowboy coffee, but it'll do," McCree judged.

Zarya lifted her teacup for a toast. "To good tea with good friends." Everyone chorused their agreements as they drank. And Mei... Mei was sitting in the middle of it soaking the closeness and affection in like a sponge before she realized what she was doing. She rushed through putting her tea set away and went back to the lab and her numbers. It was just one small lapse, it didn't have to mean anything.

But the next day at breakfast Tracer shared her favorite Earl Grey. Then a few days later Zarya brought out a samovar and brewed smokey Russian tea for everyone, describing how her grandmother taught her the art of it. And a few days after that Hanzo made matcha for everyone, and post-breakfast tea with the group was a regular occurrence, a closeness they were all sharing.

Occasionally Mei would play quick-moving little numbers games with Winston, when they were both stressed out and needed a break from their individual projects to clear their heads. Then he begged her to join him at games night to help keep McCree from cheating, and somehow Mei found herself spending hours laughing along with everyone, betting for no stakes other than the little chips of plastic they used as counters. Her toe was tapping to Lucio's music, her shoulder leaning against Zarya's solid arm, all wrapped up in the warmth and companionship.

It was addictive, even though Mei knew better than to give in. She'd learned better than that.

She still joined in on the next game night. And the next.

It might have been easier to brush of if she still wasn't falling into Zarya's bed. The _first_ time could be blamed on adrenaline. After that, well, it was becoming a _pattern_. Climate science was all about noticing patterns, and Mei was one of the best. She knew one when she found herself inside it. She kept her nails trimmed very short, these days.

Fight a successful mission to keep Talon from plundering an old Overwatch base, scale Zarya like a mountain. A mountain that moaned and kissed and called Mei beautiful. See Zarya coming out of the showers after her daily workout, smile back at Zarya's raised eyebrows, and tumble into Zarya's bed. Forget dinner, too busy with some very weird anomalies, and come across Zarya making herself a second supper in the kitchen—spend _hours_ talking and laughing about anything and nothing, invite Zarya back to her own room for the first time. It was slow that time, warm and gentle exploration. They spent half the night on sex. Every time they thought they were done they touched just a little more, kissed just a little more, and before they knew it they were chasing after more orgasms.

Zarya's lips were warm against the back of Mei's neck, her body a solid column of heat curled around the back of Mei's. Mei confessed in a whisper how much she'd thought about getting a strap-on to use on her, and Zarya murmured how very much she'd like that.

The thought sent shivers of eagerness through Mei, but they were both yawning and exhausted at that point. She fell asleep seriously pondering the best way to smuggle a strap-on harness and dildo into the base without anyone knowing.

Mei woke in the morning with Zarya's elbow perilously close to her face, and her knee digging into Zarya's hip, and both of them nearly falling off the edges of the small bed. It was anything but romantic, really, but Mei spent long minutes admiring Zarya's sleeping face.

Awake, Zarya was bigger than life, loud and laughing and boasting (or was it really boasting if she really _was_ as strong as she said she was?). Asleep, she looked younger. There was a worry line between her eyebrows that never faded, even in sleep, and Mei had to fight down the sudden desire to kiss it, or rub her thumb across it to smooth it out. As if that would be enough to lift the weight of responsibilities that had put it there in the first place.

The roots of her hair were very light brown, what they called in English 'dirty blond'. She would probably be re-dying it soon. Mei wondered if she might need help with it.

The scar on Zarya's forehead had always been there, in even the earliest pictures of Zarya winning strength competitions. Last night she'd confessed that she didn't remember not having it. She got it as a child, when she lost her parents to the first omnic crisis. Her grandmother had raised her, and a mind-boggling number of aunts and uncles. And Mei... Mei had shared far too much about her parents—gone now, without her—about her college girlfriends, married off now and scattered and hardly remembering her. About the eco-Watchpoint scientists she'd loved as a family.

_Gone, all gone._

For a moment Mei had been able to forget the pain of it, and smile with the happiest of the memories. Zarya was hungry for details about the time Mei came from. She had grown up in a very different world than Mei had, and the difference in their ages was dizzying and disorienting. On paper, Mei was much older than Zarya, even if they were nearly the same age in subjective time lived. Being frozen didn't count as aging, but Mei was still from a very different time.

But then, they always would have been very different people, from very different countries. Mei tried to climb out of bed without waking her, only to see Zarya's eyes open and watching her back before she even figured out how to untangle the blankets.

"Morning, _snezhinka_." Zarya's voice was so warm and gentle Mei was sure the second word was something nice, even if she didn't know what it meant. Zarya carefully shifted herself in the blankets, careful not to tip Mei off the edge of the bed, and ran her thumb across Mei's cheek before leaning in for a soft morning kiss.

Mei instantly forgot all about leaving the bed and cuddled in closer. Zarya's hand drifted down Mei's shoulder to her waist to pull her in snug and warm.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to wake you up," Mei apologized, once she had her breath back.

"No apologies," Zarya reminded, nudging Mei's nose with her own. "Is the _best_ way to wake up." Her hand wandered up from Mei's back to squeeze one plump breast and Mei pushed into it with a little whimper. She was still sensitive from the night before.

"We'll be late for breakfast?" Mei tried, even as her hands were wandering all over the gloriously muscled bulk of Zarya—not at all ready to stop.

"Maybe I will have breakfast in bed," Zarya answered, eyes twinkling. She pushed the blankets down, pushing her face into Mei's breasts to kiss and rub her face all over them with nomming sounds. Mei squealed a giggle that ended on a moan when Zarya set to sucking her nipple seriously, a sharp point of focused pleasure. It didn't take much to turn Mei into a squirming moaning mess again.

"Here." Zarya nuzzled Mei's breasts one last time and pulled away, rolling onto her back with Mei on top of her. Her cheeks were flushed pink, beautiful in her arousal. "Sit on me." Zarya licked her lips meaningfully, miming Mei's body above her face, and Mei blushed herself as she hurried to comply. Sitting on Zarya's face was definitely something she wanted. Had she mentioned it last night, half asleep?

Then Zarya moaned and licked up into Mei, her sturdy hands steadying Mei's hips, and Mei forgot about anything but the pleasure. Zarya was so good with her tongue, and Mei was already so sensitive. Warmth flushed through Mei's body, tight in her belly and thighs, the release of orgasm shaking her through.

Zarya easily lifted Mei off herself when she was done, and it still never failed to make Mei melt inside. She set Mei in her lap and kissed her with lips still slippery with her juices, tangy and slick, before she checked the time and sighed.

"I must go. I have a mission today," Zarya said, and Mei couldn't help the little disappointed sound that came out of her throat. Zarya chuckled softly, kissing her again, eyes soft. "I will be back. Promise, _snezhinka_."

"Of course," Mei said, and climbed out of her lap to set Zarya free. Their clothes were a mess, scattered together across the floor, but they got them sorted out quickly enough so Zarya could dress. Zarya splashed some water on her face and hands to clean them, briefly ran her fingers through her hair, and was ready to go.

Zarya threw one last smile and wink behind her, and was gone, and Mei was left to deal with the worry in her belly on her own. The mission Zarya had gone on was a simple one, and the people going with her would keep her safe (just as Zarya would keep _them_ safe), but there was still some part of Mei that was sure she was never going to see Zarya again.

Mei focused on her work, but there was some part of her that didn't relax until she saw the carrier land again, and a big pink-haired woman swagger out of it with an oversized gun over her shoulder. Zarya put her gun away and was smacking people's back in greeting when she caught sight of Mei, and she grinned wider than ever and immediately swept her up in a huge hug, spinning the two of them around and laughing.

"Oh, I want to hug you like a big, fuzzy, Siberian bear!" she crowed, and nuzzled her face into Mei's neck to make her giggle. It felt so good to be swept up and held in Zarya's strong arms. So good, and too much.

Far too much.

Mei stuck close to Zarya through dinner, her belly going squirmy each time Zarya's hand rested on her back or shoulder, and came to Zarya's bedroom when she was invited, but she went back to her own room after.

What Mei needed was some space. There were still eco-Watchpoints she hadn't searched out and scavenged for data yet. What she needed was some mountain-climbing, all on her own, to get her head on straight. Attachments were a very bad idea, and she was getting stuck to everyone in Overwatch. It would be much, much easier without attachments.

Mei researched her options carefully, and chose an abandoned eco-Watchpoint high in the Swiss Alps. It would be challenging but not impossible to reach on her own, and in a safe enough part of the world that nobody would make a fuss about sending her. Perfect for her purposes.

Mei delivered her travel plans and equipment requests to Winston the next morning over breakfast. "I need more data for my models," Mei said, in explanation. "The Swiss eco-Watchpoint should fill in some holes, if I can scavenge the data out of it."

"Oh, yes. Of course." Winston searched out his glasses, perching them on his face to look her writeup over. "Very well organized, Dr. Zhou. Who will be going with you?"

"Sorry. I was going alone," Mei apologized. "I don't want to take anyone away from their work."

"Nonsense, nonsense," Winston waved it off. "This kind of mountaineering is dangerous. You need a partner. Your work is very valuable, and so are you."

"I'm not helpless, I know what I'm doing," Mei tried again.

"Mountain climbing?" Zarya, looked over Winston's shoulder to read Mei's travel plans. She was carrying a big plate with an impressive mountain of scrambled eggs stacked on it. She nodded to herself, eating another bite. "I will go."

"Thank you Zarya, that would be perfect," Winston said.

Everything seemed to be spiraling out of Mei's control. "You don't have to," Mei tried, one last time. "I'm fine on my own."

"It will be good," Zarya said. "I've been doing too much strength training. It's time for cardio! High mountains. Good for the lungs."

"You'll get frostbite," Mei warned. Zarya was always sleeveless, on even the coldest days.

Zarya just smiled, stroking Mei's cheek with the back of a knuckle. "I have equipment," she promised. "You like chocolate, _da_? We will get Swiss chocolate together, after."

And that, it seemed, was that. It turned out that Zarya _did_ have a hat with ear flaps to keep her ears warm, and mittens, and a big fluffy parka. She just never saw the need to wear them for anything warmer than the depths of a Russian winter.

The Swiss alps were cold enough to earn Zarya's respect.

Despite her plan having backfired spectacularly, Mei _did_ enjoy traveling with Zarya. She was easy to laugh with on the long train rides, and just as easy to trust to be careful when they were roped together and navigating tricky ice.

They made it to the abandoned eco-Watchpoint in one very long day, and Mei set out a few ice walls as wind blocks around their camp. They could start to explore the broken building the next day, after a good night's sleep. Overwatch might be hiding in the shadows, trying to keep out of notice as they gathered together, but they had great gear. Cold-weather camping equipment had gotten even lighter and better insulated while Mei was frozen. The little camp stove worked beautifully even at high altitude, and the dehydrated food reconstituted into a surprisingly tasty soup over it. The tent was roomy and very well insulated when Mei and Zarya retired to it for the night.

"You are very good at this," Zarya commented, as they climbed into their thick fluffy sleeping bags, pressed close side to side. "Probably you _could_ have done it alone, but I am glad to be here."

"Why?" Mei asked, and it came out much more whining than she'd intended. She was just so tired, with the low oxygen and the long hike. "Why are you doing this? I'm _fine_ alone."

" _Nyet_... no." Zarya murmured, rolling over onto her side. She reached out of her sleeping bag to rub Mei's shoulder. "Winston likes quiet time. Hanzo likes to be alone, sometimes. You do not like it, _snezhinka_. You are hungry for companions in Overwatch. You are lonely, but afraid."

Mei inhaled, deep and shaking. That was too much of the truth, more than anyone should have been able to tell of Mei. She was always cheerful, always kept her distance. She just couldn't do that with Zarya.

"Everyone dies," Mei's lips were shaking, and burning tears prickled at the corners of her eyes. "Everyone _dies_ , I can't..." She couldn't finish, and reached out of her own sleeping bag to push Zarya away. Like that was ever going to work.

Zarya let go of Mei's shoulder, putting her hand over Mei's, so very warm and gentle. "Everyone dies," she agreed, "but first we _live_. No fear."

Mei's fingers curled in, wrapping around the hem of Zarya's shirt to cling. "You'll die," she accused. "You'll die and I... I can't..." She was really crying now, tears falling from her squeezed-shut eyes.

"I try not to," Zarya promised. "All of Overwatch tries not to. We are here now. Together." She got both arms out of her sleeping bag to wrap them around Mei, and Mei pushed herself as close to Zarya as she could. They probably looked ridiculous, like inchworms trying to cuddle, but she didn't care. It felt good to be held, and she was so tired.

Crying at high altitude wasn't going to do her and favors, just make her more tired and risk dehydration, but Mei didn't really have control of it. Thankfully, the tears didn't have the energy to sustain themselves long, and soon Mei was only sniffling slightly against Zarya's collarbone.

"Here." Zarya let go of Mei for a moment, half-rolling away to dig around in her backpack. She came back with a little foil-wrapped square. "Swiss chocolate." She handed it over with a smile.

"When did you get this?" Mei asked, eagerly unwrapping it to take a bite. It was chalky at first, being cold, but then it melted into rich sweetness in her mouth. Mei offered her a bite of chocolate, but Zarya waved it off and Mei happily popped the rest into her mouth. Chocolate always made everything more bearable.

"I am as sneaky as I am strong," Zarya asserted grandly, only to laugh when Mei gave her a look. "The train station, while you checked the baggage."

"Thank you," Mei said, tugging Zarya close again, and Zarya was quick to wrap her arm around Mei. "I _am_ glad you're here... even if inchworm cuddles are silly."

"I tell you a secret," Zarya told her, smile on her voice and crinkling the corners of her eyes. "The sleeping bags zip together." She lifted her eyebrows at Mei, hopeful and just a little teasing.

Really, Mei had no _choice_ but to pull her in to share a sweet chocolate kiss.

"Let's do that, then."

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks all for reading!  
> Please let me know what you thought! Either here in the comments, or I can be found as Thorinsmut on tumblr as well.  
> <3  
> TS


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